Ah, the synopsis. All authors love writing these joyous little gems of prose. For those who don't find them as enjoyable or intuitive, here's a handy step-by-step guide to writing a synopsis at the professional level:

Step 1: Don't. Can you get out of this in any possible way? Can you get someone else to write it for you? It's fine if that someone is not a writer; the synopsis can't possibly come out any worse than the one you would have written. See if you can outsource the synopsis to a child or a monkey with a typewriter. They'll do a better job than you.

Step 2: If you must write the synopsis (no kids or monkeys handy), accomplish everything else in your life first. Clean the bathroom, mop the floors, take your dog to the groomer, trim your toenails. Have you been wanting to follow up on that one random insurance question that will force you to sit on hold for fifteen hours? Now is a good time to do that.

Step 3: Once you've accomplished everything else in your life that needed doing, you'll be tired. It's time to sleep. You can worry about the synopsis tomorrow.

Step 4: Ignore the synopsis.

Step 5: Deadline is approaching. You only have one day to write the synopsis. No worries, you still have plenty of time. Why don't you start outlining that book you thought of as you were falling asleep a few months ago? Now is a good time for that.

Step 6: You have fourteen minutes until your deadline. It's time to write your synopsis.

Step 7: Do a really terrible job. It will teach the recipient a valuable lesson and hopefully they will no longer submit writers to this torture. 

Step 8: Well done. You're a professional writer. Why do people complain about synopses so much, you wonder. They're not that bad after all.